Emotional Intelligence For Managers (And You)

Are you a manager who enjoys being around people, thrives on developing positive relationships with your peers, your boss, stakeholders and your team members?  Or are you the kind of manager who would prefer to avoid the ‘touchy feely‘ aspects of management, preferring to focus on analysing data, designing processes, reviewing systems and auditing quality?

Relax.  Whichever is your preference, there isn’t a right or wrong answer. With many managers being promoted largely, or purely, on their technical expertise in a non people management role, to ensure a healthy and meaningful management career, it is worth exploring and investing in, the softer, deeply human aspects of people management, motivation, engagement and coaching.  Why?  Because if you want to enjoy what is commonly deemed ‘discretionary effort’ from your team members, you need to possess at least a reasonable level of Emotional Intelligence.

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

In a nutshell, Emotional Intelligence explores how we manage our own emotions, and how we help other people to manage theirs.’

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Do Your Words Cause Damage?

Have you ever considered the impact that your language has on yourself and also on other people?

OK, you have probably had one or two occasions when you have said something in the heat of the moment that you’ve later regretted. Ouch! But what about everyday language, phrases that don’t sound like they are harmful, but really can be.

Think about these little nuggets:

I’ve spoken to him til I’m blue in the face‘…No you haven’t. A blue face usually means you’re either choking or your body is freezing. Nothing more. Have you ever seen someone’s face go blue just because they’re a little peeved at someone?

He’s too long in the tooth to learn anything new‘. What have long teeth got to do with someone’s ability and/or willingness to learn?

You can’t teach an old dog new tricks‘. Well, unless you work in a zoo or for the RSPCA, there’s unlikely to be any dogs or tricks. Yet again, a few carefully selected words can cause problems.

There aren’t enough hours in the day‘.  Yes there are, there’s always 24.  The challenge is how you choose to use them.

During my very early years in executive and management development, some one to one coaching sessions could become rather heated. The key reason was the client had something on his or her mind and this forum was the only or safest place to be really open and genuine – which is always a humbling expression of trust.

One such instance which I do have permission to share with you is when a very demanding boss who felt he was CONSTANTLY being LET DOWN by his 4 direct reports had reached THE END OF THE LINE (what line?) and was intent on taking these individuals OFF LINE (nice way of saying a real rollocking) and a PIECE OF MY MIND. He had been KICKED IN THE TEETH and STABBED IN THE BACK so many times that enough was enough, and he was going to put an end to it!

This client was usually very assertive in his communication, but by no means aggressive. Thankfully, our brief relationship had developed in to a high level trust relationship and we had permission to question, challenge and disagree with each other, but only on the condition that such behaviour would help him develop and grow. So here’s what happened.

After listening to a full 7 minutes of profanities from him, mixed in with a table leg being kicked, by him, profuse perspiring, again, from him, and my ears losing their feeling, I politely asked ‘May I see your teeth?’. ‘What?’ he replied, somewhat shocked by my unusual request. ‘May I see your teeth, just for a moment. I’d really like to see your gnashers‘, posturing with a big smile and clattering my teeth for full effect.

His anger turned to shock, his shock quickly morphed to confusion, all in a matter of seconds. I continued, ‘OK, you won’t show me your teeth, I understand….so please take off your shirt.’ This was a risky step. What reaction would I receive? Well, it was one of extreme anger. But not directed at me. I just happened to be a trustworthy vehicle on which to transport his learning. ‘PROFANITY, no way pal’, was followed a second or two later with a relieved smile on his face and a raucous belly laugh as he pointed to me and said ‘I know what you’re up to Scott. You want to see all of the knife scars on my back don’t you?’. ‘Absolutely, and I’m sure there are many, aren’t there?’ I replied.

Bingo, The Light At The End of The Tunnel Has Been Switched On!

From this moment on, the coaching session became a calm, thinking environment where the few things that mattered most to him and his company were thought through, talked through and solutions to each of the problems generated. And all in less than 2 hours.

During the following 3 months, 3 of his managers began to perform better than they had ever done, while 1 other left the organisation by mutual agreement. The executive came to realise that if his team were failing, he was playing an active role in this happening. And, if his team were to perform optimally, he had an important role to play in achieving this too.

Just think what the possible outcome could have been if this really decent, technically brilliant, hard-working and caring man had handled the situation in the manner he initially had intended. Managers could have been the walking wounded(oh, there I go, I’m doing it now), and their brains would have counted this latest verbal assault as the norm.

So remember, be very careful about the language you use and also, check understanding of what other people actually mean when they use old cliches to express how they are feeling at any given moment. It could save you many headaches and a few heartaches too.

Are your managers really aware of the impact, both positive and negative, they are having on their team members, peers and your stakeholders? If not, it may be a good thing for you to invest some time with them to boost their self awareness and self management skills. It won’t take long and could pay significant dividends for your organisation.

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How To Develop Emotionally Intelligent Managers

Emotional Intelligence training for managers can be well intentioned, but fall flat on its face when the ‘learning’ focuses mainly on the theory rather than practical application of emotional intelligence skills in the real-world of organisations.

As an aspiring or existing manager, the importance of developing Emotional Intelligence skills and competencies cannot be overstated.  In this 4 minute video clip, Emotional Intelligence expert and presenter Scott Watson shares a few thoughts on how traditional management styles and practises deserve to be complemented with a set of unique and deeply human skills.

Management Training – How To Develop Emotional Intelligence in Managers

How To Get Promoted – Lucy’s Case Study

From ‘OK’ to ‘Outstanding’ Results…With A Promotion, Pay Rise And Company Car

Meet Lucy…

Lucy is 31 years of age and a Customer Service and Sales Manager in the call centre division of a major UK Bank.

Eight managers hold the same title, status, salary band and benefits as Lucy. Promotions within the division are rare. When they do arise, despite a ‘fair’ interview process taking place, senior bosses have already earmarked the successful applicant; and it never seems to be Lucy.

With 8 years of service at the bank, 4 within her current management role, Lucy is itching for a promotion, new challenges, a new salary and a company BMW 320D!

Lucy’s Challenge…Is Also Your Challenge

Lucy’s challenge may be the same as you have already experienced; or will do in the future when applying for a promotion.  Her biggest challenge isn’t getting promoted, its…

‘How do I differentiate myself from my peers and get a head start on my peers for the next promotion?’

Stuck…With Nowhere To Go

Managing 6 Team Leaders and 90 front-line customer service and sales agents, Lucy’s team was considered ‘reliable and conscientious‘ by her Director and line manager, and she was.  Absenteeism was low, productivity was always slightly ahead of average, and quality was high.  Still, she wasn’t getting the nod where promotions were involved.  She was stuck on small annual salary increases, just like everybody else.  Due to the financial meltdown in the UK, bonuses had become a distant memory!

The Rut And Fear of Change

Lucy felt stuck in a rut.  She daren’t leave her employer in the middle of the biggest economic downturn in living history, couldn’t pluck up courage to ask her boss for a pay rise, and she definitely wouldn’t think of using command and control management to get her team performing better to boost the numbers her boss was so interested in.

What Changed?

Lucy chose to participate in our immersive 2 day Management Masterclass. Her current ways of thinking, communicating, collaborating and managing were questioned, her motivation and purpose explored in detail, and what she found out about herself wasn’t just eye-opening – it was liberating.

She didn’t actually WANT the promotionshe wanted what the promotion would give her.  More money in her pocket, a healthier bank balance, a bigger pension pot, and… more personal freedom.  More freedom to buy that new BMW if she wanted, more freedom to invest in a new home, more freedom to enjoy more holidays, and much more! Do you want more freedom?

Renewed Focus, Clarity And Motivation

With renewed focus, clarity, and a healthy dose of self motivation, Lucy set off in a new direction in her career.  Within just 4 weeks of participating in the Masterclass, Lucy’s team had boosted customer satisfaction ratings, sold more products and services, and become even more productive, motivated and committed.  And, she had heard on the grapevine that a new senior management role may be announced in just a few months time.

Lucy’s Result?

Lucy won the promotion she wanted, she secured a pay rise which was above the salary band on offer, she didn’t have to buy a car as her employer now provided her with a car (and free fuel).

She bought a new home having saved her deposit more quickly than she had planned.  Oh, and 9 months in to her new role, her Director approved her taking a 3 month ‘career break’ so that she could travel to and explore her dream holiday destination, India.

How About You?

You may not want to travel to India, and you may not even want a new car or home. But, just as Lucy found, becoming an even more effective, results focused and emotionally intelligent manager, significantly increased her opportunities. Similar opportunities will become available to you if you commit to learning how to become a top performing manager with a great reputation, personal credibility and an ability to exceed expectations.  All of this… allows you more freedom.

Lucy’s Testimonial from her Masterclass

Free 2 Week Email Course

If you haven’t already, why not sign up for our 2 week Introduction To The Secrets of Top Performers email course?  You’ll learn how to boost your personal effectiveness, enhance team engagement, motivation and productivity and significantly improve your personal credibility.

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Becoming A Manager – A Lifestyle Choice

Just How Much Would Becoming A Highly Effective Manager Improve Your Lifestyle?

Not every Manager can become one of the top 1% of high performing managers in their organisation.  In fact, some may not want to develop their career, attract more opportunities and gain more financial freedom.  And that’s an understandable personal choice.  But what about those who do?

What About You?

Are you the kind of person who is prepared to invest a little effort, focus and time to begin transforming not just your effectiveness as a Manager, but your lifestyle too?  If you are, Mobile Management Guru could be just the toolkit that will help you achieve your goal.

Just how much could your career and lifestyle improve if you learned how to:-

  1. Achieve more, in less time, with less stress and fewer headaches?
  2. Significantly and genuinely enhance your personal credibility with bosses and decision-makers?
  3. Develop a highly motivated, engaged and committed team that achieves and exceeds tough targets and maximises quality?
  4. Position yourself as a real value-adding manager who quietly and consistently delivers excellent results?
  5. Differentiate yourself from your peers and nudge yourself towards a higher salary, better benefits and more promotion opportunities?
  6. Attract the attention of professional recruiters who want to represent you for higher paid and fulfilling opportunities?

What would learning all of this, plus much more, do for you, your career and your lifestyle?

“I learned more in two hours with Summit than I ever have on a 2 day management course”

J Wilson

Operations Manager, EE

Free 2 Week Email Course

If you haven’t already, why not sign up for our 2 week Introduction To The Secrets of Top Performers email course?  You’ll learn how to boost your personal effectiveness, enhance team engagement, motivation and productivity and significantly improve your personal credibility.

Just enter your details to secure your spot: